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clock

idol

The American Idol phenomenon has been fascinating the world for nine years now.  I’m asking myself what it is we love about the show.   We love to hate Simon.  We are loving Ellen, as always.  We are laughing and crying with the contestants.  But, what actually seduces us? The obvious answer is the Pygmalion paradigm.  We love rags to riches.  We love it when the commoner marries the prince.  We love the ugly caterpillar that turns into a gorgeous butterfly. Let’s go deeper.   What resonates with us so deeply?  Why do we love these musicians after an hour or two of knowing them?  What is it about the suggestion of fame or greatness that seduces us? Another easy answer is that it’s about fame, power and money.  I don’t buy that answer either.  I’m more inclined to believe that there is something supernatural about watching a mere human do what we think is humanly impossible.  We wait to be taken to that special place.  We wait for those moments that shiver our timbers. I watch the judges struggle for the right words to simply say….   “…  why are you guys missing this every time?”  “….why can’t you see that this is your chance of a lifetime.” ‘How can you let it fly from your grasp so easily?”  The judges want these young performers to know something that is beyond their years apparently.  It is that elusive something.  I call it “Ownership.”  Joseph Campbell called it “following your bliss.” Last night the judges couldn’t get over the piercing high note sung by Siobhan.  Like an orgasm, it lasted only seconds, but it reached past our walls.  It connected with something supernatural, superhuman.  That is what we long for.  We long to experience those unexpected shivers that surprise and dazzle us. I remember the first time I heard Johnny Mathis sing that almost imperceptible high note.  You hear it initially in your spirit.  I don’t think your ears hear that note right out of the gate.  But, we know something amazing is coming. Siobhan owned that moment.  She owned the note….  And, the song for that matter.  I would argue that consistent greatness in any discipline requires a level of ownership.  Ownership implies what the judges are trying to communicate over and over again.  Ownership takes the singer from a cabaret performance to a Pavarotti performance. How does an artist tap into ownership?  I believe there are two ways.  I have experienced the transformation with patients in my own practice.   Sometimes a person grows into ownership.  As his confidence grows, his old beliefs are dismantled organically.  The faster way, is the deliberate dismantling of old beliefs.  This dismantling process opens the gates to the supernatural. Someone needs to coach or counsel the American Idol contestants to dismantle old, debilitating beliefs.

valentines

Print Article Anyone can buy a box of chocolates, or a bouquet of flowers from the grocery store.

Only you know what makes your loved one’s heart go tick tock. Use that insider knowledge to really impress. If you are having trouble figuring out how to be romantic, try one, or all, of these romantic ideas for Valentines Day. Post it . Using a pack of post it notes, plaster the house with love notes. The small size of the post it really takes the pressure off. Simply write a few words on each, draw a heart, or write something that you love about them. Cover the bathroom, the hall, the refrigerator and the cupboards with this over the top expression of love. Shoot them . Set up a personal photo shoot, just the two of you. Make plans to walk to a nice location, or have a few props and outfit changes available at home. This romantic idea turns into a fun date that holds lots of possibilities. Use the timer and get some great couple shots. Send the best images up to a one hour photo center, or upload the pictures on your computer and spend some time photo-shopping yourselves to perfection. He Loves Me. Head to your local florist and ask for petals. Yes, petals, most flower shops will give these away for free. Sprinkle the petals in a warm bubble bath and invite your loved one to join you. Light candles and play soft music for the full effect. Put the petals in your bed with a note that says something along the lines of life with them is a bed of roses. Go ahead and switch the regular white bulbs in your bedroom with red ones to really create a romantic atmosphere. Treasure Hunt. Send your Valentine on a treasure hunt through the neighborhood. Make the notes cryptic so that it takes a little imagination to decipher the clues. Have the first note delivered that explains the rules, and then get prepared to be found at the final destination. The locations could be store to store, where they pick up a purchase that had been made in advance with additional instructions. Kidnap. First make the necessary arrangements at their place of employment. Stop in and whisk them away. Bring along a toy gun and plastic handcuffs to make it more authentic. If they cannot leave in the middle of the day, then simply lie in wait in the parking lot.

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